Any resentment toward co-workers with Kids during COVID?

As a non-smoker, I always resented the time smokers would take away from the office to take smoke breaks. It’s not like the rest of us got special breaks for similar vices/habits.

Does the same go for children? A lot of companies offer special consideration for those with kids. Is that fair to us who DON’T have kids?

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No that’s an insensitive perspective. You may not see what’s really going on behind the scenes but parents with children at home are going nuts!

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Sure, but it is also a trending topic on LinkedIn right now. I was curious as to what fashion industry professionals thought.

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I understand I wasn’t aware this was a trending topic. Thanks for bringing this topic up and I hope I can help. I think regardless of your industry it’s difficult to work remote with children. I understand how a person without children can think employees with children are getting special treatment and therefore aren’t working as hard. As a professional with an infant it’s even more difficult. I have to constantly update my boss of my whereabouts. If I need to change a diaper that’s an update, if my baby is having a meltdown and I have to soothe her that’s an update, if I have to nurse that’s an update. I don’t update on the specifics but as you can see it’s exhausting and double work. Over communication on steroids

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Great topic…and should definitely be discussed. I think truly good supervisors and/or business owners should have a meeting with their staff about this issue.

I don’t have children, yet I totally understand the need of providing flexibility during the pandemic…this should also be afforded to people who are caring for an elder relative, as certain programs/activities for seniors who need assistance are not fully operating in certain situations due to the pandemic.

Working in product development, I’ve always worked late hours and don’t mind working extra hours, if needed be…but I feel once the pandemic is over, employers should do something for the employees who put in the even more extra time…such as extra days off, and/or bonus…the problem is there is potentially a significant amount of bosses who will make empty promises.

I’m a non-smoker as well. I’ve worked with people who would go outside 3 to 4 times a day (this isn’t counting lunchbreak) to smoke for 10 to 15 minutes…I’ve even seen people go in pairs or small groups. That’s just as bad as someone who goes to a co-worker’s office to discuss a work issue, but will end up chatting for 20 to 30 minutes about personal topics before getting to business. I’m all about being friendly with your co-workers…but some people abuse it. I’ve worked with people who easily spend an accumulated 1 to 2 hours per day being social butterfly…lunch hour not included.

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While I don’t agree with certain favors for breeders, I do understand that raising children is a full time job! Especially after caring for my parents full time for just over a year. Lucky for me I wasn’t trying to do that AND hold down a job, and also lucky for me my parents could afford to hire a staff. At one point it was a 5-person job. Luckily we found a great assisted living in their budget before COVID struck and whittled that staff down to one or two!

Kids need to see their parents, so I think it’s great to give parents some flex-time. Especially for parents who can’t afford childcare. Which is most parents, really. Think of the samplemakers and cutters you work with. Who’s with their kids after school? Many have grandparents living with them to help with the kids, but not always.

Women are punished in corporate America whether we have kids or not. I suspect I’ve missed out on a lot of post-MBA jobs because recruiters assumed I’d want to spend too much time with my nonexistent kids. Who knows. While it’s not right for them to do this, this is what they do. I seriously doubt that PTO for parents makes anyone want to suddenly have kids, I know it wouldn’t change my mind about being child-free. In countries that have a year of m/paternity leave, they also have a thriving freelance industry for people like me who’d be more than happy to just come fill in for a year. And the government pays the person on leave, I think. At least that’s how it should be, especially if they work for a small company.

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yeah, once upon a time, apparel companies gave some reasonable benefits for overtime. Not anymore, at least at most of them. They bleed you dry and shove you out the minute you even THINK of asking for more money. This happened to me at a NY brand I loved working for, after a particularly insane pre-show season where the designer hired some “celebrity stylist” who had no idea how long it took to make something.

After the show, I gathered the other patternmakers together to demand we get a decent bonus. Of course management argued our salary was bonus enough. They threw us each a bone ($200, I seem to recall, for HUNDREDS of hours of OT at ~$40+/hr) and laid me off soon after, when the new division didn’t quite soar. Oh yay.

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your boss really sucks. Micromanagers are the WORST!

Not true.
Part of corporate and work culture is making time during work to be human. That means smoking, coffee breaks, kids, gossip, relaxing, chilling in each others offices, sneaking snacks, personal phone time. Even rnr sick days.
You just don’t abuse it.

Smoking, is not the same as kids.

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I traveled and worked with women who have children, and tbh they were the hardest working and most responsible employees. They get a total pass. I can’t even imagine with school being remote.

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I remember feeling a lot of resentment at some companies I worked at. Women would go on maternity leave and no one would be hired to replace them. No temps, no interns even. I would just have to shoulder the extra work for no extra pay. It really upset me and I started to hate women with children. Ive had to work really hard to get over that.

Then I had to deal with hiring discrimination. People looked at me as a young woman in her 20s and assumed I would be gone on maternity leave as soon as I was hired. Even though I am childfree by choice and won’t be having any children.

But the workplace is so hostile to peoples private lives. Ive never worked for a company who really understood work-life balance. No one was given enough paid time off, usually only 5 days per calendar year. With maybe 3 sick days. I’ve missed 2 funerals, weddings, and more because I couldn’t get time off. I’ve had to squeeze in doctors appointments at 7am so I could still get to work on time afterwards, and stressed hugely about trying to take 3 days off to see my family for Christmas. It fucking sucked.

I understand the frustration. But now, I really try not to get mad at the individuals who are getting “special” treatment - whether reduced hours, less workload, more days off, etc. I get mad at the companies who feel like they can take advantage of everyone. I watched women ask for raises only to be told that, because they had a husband with a good job that they didn’t need a raise. Yes, this really happened. Less than 5 years ago.They fuck over everyone.

I now work only freelance from home, where I am much happier not having to deal with all that.

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WHAT a relevant topic. About half of my colleagues are working part time, taking 2-3 days a week off to watch/teach/feed their children, receiving the same amount of pay. Now the other half of us work ~8am - 10pm taking on their bulk of the work. I understand this is a time in flux and we all just need to hold on a bit longer - but this is not a sustainable way to work. I think companies that have the capability to hire in staff to cover the loss of manpower absolutely should. As we know, complaining about workload is not a kosher topic in the fashion world.

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That is an honest response that doesn’t confuse feelings with reality. Thank you.

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As a freelancer still looking for work… these companies should absolutely cut the pay of people with children who are working part of the time and redirect that pay to people who will pick up the slack. It seems like a win win. Anyone willing to complain “I can’t afford a pay cut!” well yeah I cant afford to be unemployed either.

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@cocohearts yah that’s like a lawsuit waiting to happen. You can’t discriminate for people who have kids or possibly a parent that they have to take care off and reduce pay like that randomly. It should be more sold By the company as an option for parents to take less pay and work less hours as a temporary fix during these unknown times

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As a new mom during the pandemic while working full time from home for a corporate retailer I can guarantee it’s not easier on us! I am fortunate to work for a company who supports parents and are very understanding when my baby needs to join meetings but I work just as hard and as many hours (if not more) as the rest of my team.
I don’t know of any company who offers part time for parents at full time salaries. Flex is common (whether we’re in this pandemic environment or not) but that means working earlier to get off in time for daycare pick up or something of the sort.

I think I work smarter than ever before as I’m motivated to do my best as a mom and employee in order to maintain some form of sanity and success. I have even been taking on special additional projects as I’ve proven myself.

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Parents working from home are working extra if for nothing else just out of guilt and the worry that they are being perceived as working less. I wake ups before the kids, work all day and the work after they are in bed just to keep up and deflect those sorts of comments. It’s constant. Not to mention taking care of them and helping with school. I think we all need to remember that on top of work there is a pandemic going on and to be gentle and thoughtful of each other. And way less judgmental.

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As a mother that’s a bit of a slap in the face. When you’re an 80 year old my kids will pay taxes to support your medicare and pave the roads. I just work more efficiently than most people I see wasting time or faffing at work. I worked in the industry without kids but now, I guarantee you any problem I come across I can solve in a tenth of the time most people can. Because experience. And the American way of living to work is unhealthy and skewed, if you judge people’s contribution based on how much time they spend in the office, it’s a very old school way of thinking.

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